I'm the mom....

Today I had a moment where I realized the type of mom I'm not...and the type of mom I am.

I realized I'm not the cupcake mom.

And definitely not the Easter Bunny cupcake mom.

Let me back-up a bit.  I was working on a project up in the school library - one of two big ones at the school this week.  A friend of mine called and offered to take Jacob to the park with her twins who are in the morning Pre-K class.  She said they could play outside and have a picnic lunch and then bring Jacob back for his class in the afternoon, so I could get things finished up. I told her it would be perfect - and she said to come down in a few minutes as they were just finishing up the cupcakes that a mom had brought in to celebrate Easter.

I didn't think much about what she had said, besides how nice it would be for Jacob to get outside and run around instead of doing more computer games while I worked on my different projects in the library again.  He is becoming quite a pro at the Lego games, as he has ample time to practice them each week!  We walked down the hallway, chatting about the day and I told him how excited I was that he was going to have a picnic with his friends!  I had a tiny bit of a wish that I could be outside to enjoy the beautiful sunshine, but the moment was fleeting as I really wanted to get these projects checked off before we left for Spring Break!

We met the little friends downstairs and watched as child after child left the morning pre-k class holding onto a precious decorated Easter Bunny cupcake

I kissed Jacob goodbye and waved to his two little friends and gave a bit thank you to the mom & then ran back up the stairs and started to breeze down the hallway.

It was then I thought about those Easter Bunny cupcakes.  How cute they were, and how the little faces of those preschool students lit up holding their precious treats!  I realized with a swiftness that I'm not the mom that is called on to bring treats.  I don't think of it on my own either.  If there is a sign-up, I'll put my name down to bring something in for a class party and there were times in the past when I did some fun decorating of cakes, cookies and such.

I was feeling a little down - that I wasn't fulfilling some mom role that is set out there in how many cupcakes I have made for my children's class.  And as I walked along feeling a little overwhelmed with how many things I thought I should be doing, I glanced up and saw the school.  And then saw into the library with the projects I was helping with.  And that's when it hit me - I'm not an Easter Bunny cupcake mom --- but I'm a mom that does other things....and those things can be cool in their non-pink marshmallow ear sort of way....

....I worked on picture frames, mosaics, modge-podge murals on just about any object you can think of!...and so much more {these are the art projects with the 15 classes for the Silent Auction....ta da!}

I'm also a mom that is an impromptu costume designer!  I received a call 4 days before 50+ children from the school are in a performance....and suddenly need costumes!  The 3rd graders were part of a Columbian Music Performance & the musicians that we hire through a company to work with the students are quite talented....however, they are definitely unorganized!

What was I to do when the thought of all those students would go on stage without "real" costumes?  Well, I called 4 other moms and during a school day we cut, and we cut and we cut - until we had 25 ponchos, and 25 sashes with little flowers on them for the girls, 30+ colored sashes for the boys, and 25 tissue paper flowers to put into all of the girl's hair.

And the performance was fabulous!  Singing, dancing and music galore --- and the costumes were not perfect (there was not one piece of sewing we did!  If we couldn't glue gun it, we didn't do it!), however the children kept saying that they felt like "real professionals" because they all matched and had their own costumes.  It was the cutest thing to see their faces light up when we were helping them get dressed!

And I'm the type of mom - that takes on another step of the Beautification at school.  It was started last year when we did the flags representing all the nations that the children are from....we have over 60 nationalities in our school (that are reported).  The Beautification has continued this year, with finally taking art that the children have created with the new art program - and framing select pieces and hanging them around the school.  It sounded rather simple and something that would be fun to work on --- however, as many projects go, it becomes a little more complicated and a little harder as you get into the work.

This all was going on the week that Jacob got Strep Throat after Bryson already had it last week.  The week that I was supposed to be getting ready for our trip, and getting an apartment rearranged yet again (after buying something from a friend that was moving, I've had to rearrange the place....again!  It's hilarious how often this place gets redone, because of space factors and as it is small I get tired of the same view after only a very short time!).

And amazingly enough - it all got done to some degree.  It was done to the wire on Friday after school, when we finally took one grouping of framed art and went to work on the wall....4 hours later, 5 active children, 2 PTA moms, 2 pizzas and 2 custodians --- we were finally finished (and I can't believe I didn't get a picture of it!).  That is when we realized that all 60 other framed art, will continue to go up - but only one wall at a time.  It took so much longer than we anticipated....but we loved the end product so much more than we thought we would as well!

I'm so happy with the projects that I worked on this week and other weeks at the school.

I also realize that it's okay to be happy that I'm the type of mom that doesn't do Easter Bunny cupcakes.

At least right now.  And maybe for some time.

Because there are other projects.  The ones that I do for my children and their school - and when they see me at the school each time and their faces light up....I believe that they know I am doing this because I love them.  And I love being part of their life.  I love being back in a school setting.  I love projects...I just don't think of cooking projects as much as I do the other projects that fill up my days.

And hopefully - just hopefully - that will be just as good as making Easter Bunny Cupcakes & won't put them in therapy because I never made them cupcakes --- because goodness knows we'll need therapy for all the other mistakes I'm making as mom!

blah....

I sat down hoping to do a recap of the week. I tried two different ways to write it - nothing worked. So I tried to write about what I expected of the weekend. Three different starts and attempts to tell a story - still nothing worked. How frustrating!

Sometimes I have so much to say, that I don't know how I want to say everything. And other times I have nothing to say, but want to say something or everything.

This blog is mostly a blessing - yet there are a few times I think the writing curse comes out. I desperately want to say things that are on the tip of my tongue....until I go to write it, and then that witty comment disappears. I have mounds of photos that I want to share to document that we actually are living a life - we are here! we are here! we are here! {thank you Horton Hears a Who for that line, I love it). But sometimes there is just nothing that comes.

Nada.

Nada.

Enchilada.

So, I'll be back another time.

p.s. I did think of one little thing. I tried to be fun and do something for St. Patrick's Day....nothing elaborate and very fun like making a Leprochan trap.....no, I made waffles and eggs that I dyed green. It was a rather large batch of green eggs. And then NO ONE ate them. The kiddos all thought they were cool cooking in the pan, but not one person wanted to eat them.

I don't think St. Patrick's is the holiday for me and my "fun" personality. Perhaps the family will be ready to handle the color of yellow and springtime when I make eggs for Easter. :)

Normal'ish

A new blog.

A new chance to fill it up with stories, pictures and the little to big happenings of our family, our day to day tales....and what I call our "normal'ish" life.

What really is normal?

I've been wondering about this quite a bit over the past few months. I believe my definition of normal was first rocked about when we moved here to the city. Living here is unlike anything we have ever expected. Even now, after a year of living here, the day to day events which are feeling normal enough by habit - are not normal considering what we have experienced for the better part of our life. What my husband and I grew up with. What we experienced for the first 8 years of marriage and for the most part of our 3 children's lives.

I've caught myself so many times in life - and especially this past year - saying to myself, "Oh when things slow down a bit....' OR '....when things get back to normal'. Which I find rather ironic. As what really is normal?

Really. Who defines normal?

It must be ourselves and what we are used to. However, with how full life is and how it completely changes with the beat of our hearts each day - how can one ever expect for it to stay normal? Or BE normal?

There is the little saying that goes something like this - 'Normal is only the setting on your dishwasher'. (or washing machine, or some such gadget) That seems to be right. For it seems that the minute something goes well, and it might be a tad easier on my self, or my life - I want to claim it as normal. It's like my inner being wants to cry out 'Let's try to get back to that one little instant in life - that time when things felt NORMAL'.

And yet it's all very relative isn't it. It's like chasing clouds - they move, they evaporate, they change forms. Although the subject of clouds is normal - they very way they exist is not.

Perhaps the reason that normal does not really exist is that - well, we are here on earth to experience a vast array of decisions, choices and experiences. So if we continually experienced normal - than would we becoming better people each day? Would we be progressing? Would I become the best person I could be, by staying "normal". Ah. Blogging is the cheapest therapy in the world! I now have written down, what I thought in my heart would be true. Now that it comes down to having it on cyber-paper....it's the black and white. The truth. As much as I might think I want normal - that really wouldn't help me become the person I want to be - the person that I hope to become and need to become.

I concede. I have a life that does not meet the "normal" status-quo that I thought I might experience in life. We don't live in a home in the suburbs and we don't have a car. We live in a city where life is fast-paced and hectic, and completely not the norm that I had thought I would be experiencing at this point in my life.

Therefore, I shall try my very best to stop saying that 'life will get back to normal'. And enjoy the life that we have - the one we are living right at the moment. The life where there is joy, hope, frustration, sadness and a lot of learning. Oh and course there is happiness, laughter and smiles. To everything there is an up and sometimes a down. That is a part of life that might be almost considered the 'N' word!

I suppose the only part of my life that I would like to be normal-ish....are the parts of my daily life which I would like to become more habit. To help make me into that better person, as they would become habit, tradition - a bit of normal in the everyday life where things are not.

Does that work? Can we have a tad bit of normal in a not-so normal day and life? I believe there must be a way for the two to c0-exist together. So perhaps after all....I'm not conceding entirely. I am still working and looking for the ways in which to have a bit of normal'ish in a not so normal life.

Which doesn't make a lot of sense when said that way - but feels rather right to me. I'll stick with that thought until proven otherwise!